Simcha Guidelines

Simcha Guidelines for Bar/Bat Mitzvah and Aufruf

Below are the general shul guidelines for Bar/Bat Mitzvahs and Aufrufs.  

Communication:

• Please contact Donny Knoll (donnyknoll@gmail.com) to reserve a spot for leining, Valerie Levin (vlevin18@gmail.com), to place the event on the shul calendar, Holly Ohren (kiddush@arzeidarom.org) to reserve a kiddush, Mark Wiesel (hallrental@arzeidarom.org), to reserve a room (if necessary), Rabbi Ciment, and the gabbai (Donny Knoll and Shabsi Polinsky).

This will allow for greater flexibility in fulfilling and optimizing any special requests.

Leining (reading the Torah)

• Anyone wishing to lein from the Torah requires testing by either David Blass, Donny Knoll, or Ron Goldgewert months in advance.  David Blass can be contacted at rituals@arzeidarom.org If the bar-mitzvah boy is taught by an experienced teacher from the community, please have the teacher contact Donny Knoll directly.

• Any Bar mitzvah who wishes to lein parsha Parah or Zachor needs to talk to the Rabbi

Kibbudim- Honors

• For the Shabbat of the simcha the family will be offered an aliyah for the Bar Mitzvah Boy or Chattan plus three additional alliyot.

• Efforts to give the family additional alliyot will be made subject to other chiyuvim/s'machot, and at the discretion of the Rabbi and gabbai.

• Customarily the Bar Mitzvah, relative of the Bat Mitzvah, or chattan will lein the Haftorah

• Fathers, sons, and brothers are not called up in succession for alliyot

• Please fill out the kibbudim template by clicking here. Or by going to the online form on this site. Online Form. Hand Names hand-written written on paper are also acceptable.

• It is not the regular minhag of the shul to give out Hosafot (additional alliyot)

• Hagbah can be given out by the family to an experienced guest, at the discretion of the gabbai

  • Gellilah can be given out by the family to any male over the age of 13

  • Father-son and brother combinations are avoided for Hagbah-Gellilah

• Petichah-opening of the Aron Koshesh  (and Hotza’ah if applicable for a second Sefer Torah) can be given out by the family to any male over the age of 13.

• Petichah for אנעים זמירות can be given to any male above or below Bar-Mitzvah

• Please give the gabbai, in advance, a list of the Hebrew names of all honorees (and potential honorees)

• The Rabbi has asked that all men who receive Kivudim, arrive early enough in shul to daven Shacharit with the Tzibur (congregation)

Ba’al Tefilot

• The family is welcome to recommend relatives or shul members to daven Kabbalat Shabbat, Pesukei D’ Zemirah, Shacharit, Musaf, concluding services, Adon Olam, Yigdal, and Mincha

  • The Rabbi has asked that whoever leads Musaf, also arrive early enough to daven Shacharit with the Tzibur

  • Friday night davening and shabbbt mincha davening is reserved for yartzeits.

Candy Tossing

• Kosher & pareve soft candies with a Kashrut symbol approved by the Rabbi can be tossed towards the Bar Mitzvah boy or chattan – Only after the final brachot of the Haftorah.
• We recommend handing out candies only after the Haftorah begins. (There's enough time & the noise involved in handing out candy interferes with the Torah leining)

Bar/Bat –Mitzvah speaking

• The Bar or Bat Mitvah may choose to speak Shabbat morning, either before or after kiddush.  Please consult with the Rabbi (rabbi@arzeidarom.org) or president (president@arzeidarom.org) for further clarification.

Kiddush

• If you wish to sponsor Kiddush or Shalosh Seudat the week of your simcha, please contact Holly Ohren at kiddush@arzeidarom.org

Room Rental

• There is a separate form for room rental. There is a fee for a private lunch or dinner. If you do not have the form, or have questions about the form, please contact Mark Wiesel or Donny Knoll at hallrental@arzeidarom.org.