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Simcha Guidelines for Bar/Bat Mitzvah and Aufruf

Below are the general shul guidelines for Bar/Bat Mitzvahs and Aufrufs.  


  • Please contact Donny Knoll ( to reserve a spot for leining, Valerie Levin (, to place the event on the shul calendar, Holly Ohren ( to reserve a kiddush, Mark Wiesel (, to reserve a room (if necessary), Rabbi Ciment, and the gabbai (Shabsi Polinsky).

This will allow for greater flexibility in fulfilling and optimizing any special requests.

Leining (reading the Torah)

  • Any Bar mitzvah who wishes to lein parsha Parah or Zachor must receive permission from the Rabbi.

Kibbudim- Honors

  • For the Shabbat of the simcha the family will be offered an aliyah for the Bar Mitzvah Boy or Chattan plus two to three additional alliyot.

  • Efforts to give the family additional alliyot will be made subject to other member needs (other chiyuvim/s'machot), and at the discretion of the Rabbi and gabbai.

  • Customarily the Bar Mitzvah, relative of the Bat Mitzvah, or chattan will lein the Haftorah

  • Fathers, sons, and brothers are not called up in succession for alliyot

  • Please fill out the kibbudim (honors) template by clicking here. Or by going to the online form on this site online form. Hand-written names on paper are also acceptable.

  • It is not the regular minhag of the shul to give out Hosafot (additional alliyot)

  • Hagbah can be given out by the family to an experienced guest, at the discretion of the gabbai

  • Gellilah can be given out by the family to any male over the age of 13

  • Father-son and brother combinations are avoided for Hagbah-Gellilah

  • Petichah-opening of the Aron Koshesh  (and Hotza’ah if applicable for a second Sefer Torah) can be given out by the family to any male over the age of 13.

  • Petichah for אנעים זמירות can be given to any male above or below Bar-Mitzvah

  • Please give the gabbai, in advance, a list of the Hebrew names of all honorees (and potential honorees)

  • The Rabbi has asked that all men who receive honors, arrive early enough in shul to daven Shacharit with the Tzibur (congregation).

Ba’al Tefilot

  • The family is welcome to recommend relatives or shul members to lead Kabbalat Shabbat, Pesukei D’ Zemirah, Shacharit, Musaf, concluding services, Adon Olam, Yigdal, and Mincha. But any potential chazzan would have to talk with the gabbai in advance to ensure the shul's regular expectations are maintained (e.g. pace, nusach, singing, etc.)

  • The Rabbi has asked that whoever leads Musaf, also arrive early enough to daven Shacharit with the Tzibur

  • Friday night davening and shabbbt mincha davening is reserved for yartzeits.

Candy Tossing

Kosher & pareve soft candies with a Kashrut symbol approved by the Rabbi can be tossed towards the Bar Mitzvah boy or chattan – Only after the final brachot of the Haftorah.

We recommend handing out candies only after the Haftorah begins. (There's enough time & the noise involved in handing out candy interferes with the Torah leining)


Bar/Bat –Mitzvah Speech

  • The Bar or Bat Mitvah may choose to speak Shabbat morning, either before or after kiddush.  Please consult with the Rabbi ( or president ( for further clarification.


  • It is expected that the family will sponsor kiddush and help with kiddush clean-up (or hire wait staff).

  • If you wish to sponsor Kiddush or Seudat Shlisheet the week of your simcha, please contact Holly Ohren at and Donny Knoll (

Room Rental

  • There is a separate form for room rental. There is a fee for a private lunch or dinner. If you do not have the form, or have questions about the form, please contact Mark Wiesel at

Sat, April 20 2024 12 Nisan 5784